Salvador Babi
How can I go from a post about strap-ons to this? The truth is that no matter how much I try to be someone else now that I have a kid, I'm not. I'm still kooky, impatient, and tell weird stories. What I have recently realized is, that I have NO IDEA how to entertain a 2 month old. My delicious cocktail knowledge, and inappropriate stories aren't doing the trick. Fresh Prince of Bel-Air re-runs fulfill his diversity requirement, but don't seem to catch his interest. He doesn't even laugh when I do the robot.
The first month and a half were so tough. Breastfeeding was tough. Sleeping was tough. Figuring out the basics was tough. People say, "Don't you have a baby book?" Yes. I do. But when I am not in the middle of caring for Charlie I am having a meltdown or I am passed out. Doesn't really leave me much time to peruse my baby books.
What I have found the hardest is balance. Finding the time to give the dogs the attention they need to not feel neglected and act out by peeing everywhere and biting people. Finding the time to make meals, so that we can still feel normal. Finding the time to stuff diapers. Finding the time to give Chad the one on one time that we must have for each other. Finding the time to Skype with my mom for an hour every day. Finding the time to unload the NEVER ENDING DISHES. All while letting him sleep on me during the day, because I don't want him to feel like I am abandoning him. I don't interact with him for 7-8 hours at night, so I feel bad to do it all day too.
I've taken to the Internet for ideas on how to play with him. I didn't realize there was such a large amount of time where he wouldn't be grabbing at things or holding things. That's a big misconception. I assumed he could hold a rattle or a pacifier from the get go.
Figuring out the difference between normal and postpartum has been difficult too. The right amount of worry so to speak. Worrying about things like, SIDS, learning, and development. When is it too much, when is it the right amount? When do you let him cry? When do you hold him? If you take into consideration they say if he's not hungry or dirty, let him cry....that's not much. My kid is massive. He's always hungry or in need of a change.
I must say, he's perfect to me. I know other people out there may not find him to the perfect, but in my eyes he is. His long eyelashes, his "ma" cry, his gurgles and grunts are just perfect. Today, I will find the strength to let him "cry it out." Today, I won't go rushing in to save him.
Today, I did.
It was terrible.
We are starting the transition to move him to his own room. The idea saddens and terrifies me. Yea, we have a video monitor, but I won't be RIGHT THERE.
For now, it's time to feed him, and sing him his new favorite song. The Itsy Bitsy Spider.
It's pretty awesome to be me.
Today, I did.
It was terrible.
We are starting the transition to move him to his own room. The idea saddens and terrifies me. Yea, we have a video monitor, but I won't be RIGHT THERE.
For now, it's time to feed him, and sing him his new favorite song. The Itsy Bitsy Spider.
It's pretty awesome to be me.
I had the same deal, the same, "What do I do with a floppy 2-month-old all day?!" Sometimes I'd be almost panicked by how much time we still had to fill, and it seemed like I had exhausted every possible activity. Also, my dog still acts out by peeing everywhere, especially if I'm feeding Emmett.
ReplyDeleteAlso, don't do anything "they" or "the books" say to do if it doesn't feel right. Trust your mama instinct. We've never let Emmett cry, and we don't regret it for one second.